Caste a non-social contract for psychological choices: Like and dislike.

One of the major concerns of Indians’ psychological choices is the caste identity. However, before we understand the psychological impact of caste identity, we must understand why Indians believe in and follow the caste. One solution to this topic in the contemporary period is that human contracts serve as the foundation for forming societal institutions through social contact.

Mostafa Ewees & Dr. Krishan Kumar

People turn to a higher authority that requires their loyalty in order to give security since they are unable to defend themselves against internal and external attacks. Hobbes, for instance, describes a social compact in which community members cede control of their existence to a higher authority known as the “leviathan.”

In India, however, we have witnessed the gradual conclusion of a ” Caste is an anti-social contract”, which is the division of people in the grading. Pulitzer Prize-winning author Isabel Wilkerson accepted, after a deep study of the era of Jim Crow, that racism is not a sufficient term to understand the pain of blacks; instead, caste is an appropriate term. Racism is reflected in our skin, while casteism exists in our bones.

Caste and race are not matters of feelings; instead, they are matters of power. The USA and India, though profoundly different, have adopted social hierarchies, keeping their dominant caste separate and above those deemed lower. Both countries enacted laws to chain the lowest groups — Dalits in India and African Americans in America — to the bottom, using terror and force to keep them there. While racism has been a cause of discrimination and exclusion globally, it was produced during hard-core capitalism, when human beings became the means of production to enhance profit in business.

However, the non-social contract refers to a political and social order in which a situation is unilaterally imposed on the people without their consent. In this order, power has become more and more sacred and has been detached from society, and as a result, society or the republic no longer plays much role in the legitimacy of power. People are perceived as “weak-minded” and lack the ability to discern. It is also said that the theocracy is legitimate even without the consent of the people.

In the contemporary era, caste is inserted in the psychology of some people without their consent, as if someone is non-vegetarian, s/he must be a Dalit, and non-Dalit should not be like him/her. On the other hand, different kinds of mugging have been going on in the psychology of Dalits, and Brahmins have been responsible for all their problems.  Indians like and dislike the caste identity most of time, which is illogical.

However, Stanford Psychology Professor Mostafa Ewees writes about the complexities of human relations and human behavior, both are responsible for the individual choices of like and dislike. Caste is a matter for society but it should be not a matter of liking and disliking someone. Professor Ewees deep insights on human psychology explained eight signs someone genuinely likes and dislikes you but hides it well. Navigating social interactions can be quite a puzzle, especially when people don’t always wear their hearts on their sleeves. You see, not everyone is an open book. Some folks are really good at hiding their true feelings, especially negative ones. According to psychology, there are subtle signs that can hint if someone genuinely doesn’t like you, even if they’re camouflaging it well.

In this article, we’re uncovering those 8 tell-tale signs to help you read between the lines. So strap in and let’s decode human behavior together – it’s going to be an enlightening ride!

1) They’re not mirroring you

It’s a basic human tendency to mirror the behavior of people we like. This process, known as “mirroring,” is a psychological phenomenon where we subconsciously copy the gestures, speech patterns, or attitudes of those we’re interacting with.

But what happens when someone isn’t doing that? When a person genuinely likes you, they’ll often mimic your body language. It’s their subconscious way of saying, “Hey, I’m on the same wavelength as you.” But if they’re not mirroring your gestures or expressions, it could be a subtle sign that they’re not feeling the love. Of course, not everyone is a natural at mirroring, and it’s not an exact science. But if you notice this pattern persisting over time, it could be a signal that they’re not as fond of you as they appear. Just remember to take this with a pinch of salt though – it’s only one piece of the puzzle!

2) They’re always too busy

There’s a saying that goes: “We make time for what we value.” But what if someone continually tells you they’re too busy? In my own experience, I had a friend who would always say she was too swamped to hang out. At first, I bought it – life gets hectic, right? But then, I started noticing she was spending time with other friends and posting about it on social media. It became clear that she was not too busy for everyone, just too busy for me. It was a hard pill to swallow but an important realization. So, if someone’s always too tied up to spend time with you yet seems available for others, it might be a sign they’re not as into your company as they claim to be. However, remember that context matters and this alone doesn’t definitively prove dislike. It’s just another piece of the puzzle.

3) Their body language is closed off

Body language can often speak louder than words. Whether we realize it or not, our bodies reveal a lot about our feelings toward others. If someone genuinely likes you, their body language is usually open and inviting. They might lean in when you’re talking, maintain eye contact, or have their feet and body pointed toward you. On the other hand, closed-off body language – like crossed arms, avoidance of eye contact, or turning their body away from you – can be a sign of discomfort or disinterest.

A study conducted by Albert Mehrabian, a renowned psychologist, revealed that 55% of communication comes from body language. So if someone’s body language towards you is often closed off, it could be another subtle indicator that they might not like you as much as they let on.

4) They don’t initiate contact

It’s always nice when someone reaches out, whether it’s a simple text asking how your day was or an invitation to hang out. It shows they’re thinking of you and value your company. But what if you’re always the one reaching out? If someone never initiates contact with you but responds when you reach out to them, it might be a sign that they’re not as invested in the relationship as you are.

Remember, relationships are a two-way street. If you constantly find yourself doing all the work to maintain the connection, it could be that they’re not as enthusiastic about your company as they appear to be. Nevertheless, bear in mind that everyone has different communication styles, and this factor alone doesn’t necessarily mean they dislike you. It’s just another potential sign to consider.

5) They’re indifferent to your success

There’s something beautiful about sharing joy. When we genuinely like someone, we feel happy for their accomplishments and successes. It’s a shared celebration, a testament to the bond we share with them. But what if someone doesn’t share that joy? What if they seem indifferent or disinterested in your victories?

I once had a huge win in my career, a moment I’d been working towards for years. The people who cared about me were over the moon. But one person barely reacted, their response was more of polite acknowledgment than shared excitement. It hurt but it was also a wake-up call. If someone can’t be happy for your success, it could be an indicator that they don’t hold you in as high regard as you thought. Remember though, everyone expresses emotions differently and what might come off as indifference could just be their way of processing things. But if it’s a consistent pattern, it might be a sign worth noting.

6) They rarely offer genuine compliments

Compliments are a form of social currency. When we genuinely like someone, we often notice their positive attributes and feel compelled to mention them. But what happens when the compliments are few and far between? Or worse, when they’re thinly veiled criticisms? I remember working on a project with a colleague who was never short of ‘constructive feedback’. It took me a while to realize that I hardly ever heard anything positive from them. It was always about what could be improved, never about what was already good. In hindsight, it became clear to me that this behavior was a sign of their underlying dislike for me. It wasn’t about improving the project; it was about undermining my confidence. Of course, it’s important to note that some people are naturally more critical and less expressive with their compliments. But if you notice that someone rarely has anything positive to say about you or your work, it could be a subtle sign of their true feelings.

7) They avoid deeper conversations

Small talk is easy. Discussing the weather, weekend plans, or the latest TV show requires little emotional investment. But deeper conversations? Those require a certain level of comfort and interest. If someone genuinely likes you, they’ll usually be open to discussing more profound topics. It could be about personal beliefs, life goals, or even your insecurities. But if you notice someone consistently steering clear of deeper conversations and sticking to surface-level chatter, it might be a subtle sign that they’re not as invested in the relationship as you are. However, not everyone is comfortable with deep conversations, especially not right away. Always remember to consider the context and the person’s natural communication style. It’s just another aspect to keep in mind when trying to decipher someone’s true feelings towards you.

8) Your intuition tells you something’s off

Sometimes, despite all the signs and subtle hints, the most reliable indicator is your gut feeling. Our intuition often picks up on nuances that our conscious mind misses, making us feel uneasy without knowing why. If you consistently feel like something’s off when you interact with someone, it could be because they’re concealing their true feelings towards you. Trust your instincts. They’re your subconscious mind’s way of processing all the subtle signals you’re picking up. If you can’t shake off that feeling of unease, it might be worth considering that they might not like you as much as they pretend to.

Authors – Mostafa Ewees, PhD, Stanford Psychoanalysis & Educational Psychology Professor at Stanford University in California & Pathfinder Training chairman. And

Dr. Krishan Kumar is a scholar based in Haryana specializing in Dalits and Marginalized Studies and founder of International Ambedkarites’ Network.